Ninty Second Speech for Ordinands

It is the tradition of the Toronto Conference of The United Church of Canada, at the Conference annual meeting, to share their visions that came out of their journey for preparing their ministry. Rev. John Lee was diferred from ordination, but was given an opportunity to share his vision. John saw hmself fully ready for ministrty and was confident to begin the ministry. In this time of despair, John heard the voice saying, "Not with what you have, but with your whole-self." The has been the key passage that John has been reflecting upon when he evaluated his ministry.

Four years go, when I started my new venture of preparing for ministry, I had to give up my business which I loved so much and my desires to be come successful in business, become richer and enjoy the sweeter part of life. At that time, I thought I could not fully understand how, a man of faith, Abraham had felt when he had to give up his beloved son Isaac as a burnt offering.  

After four years of struggling at Emmanuel and training in real ministry,  I was confident that I was fully ready to start. I dreamed and pictured the days of excitement that I anticipated to come. But, last Wednesday, I’ve got a phone call from the settlement committee saying,  "There is no place for you John, let us pray for a miracle to happen." All I could do was to pray for that miracle. So I prayed. But my prayer was rather a cry out to God developed into an argument with God. What's wrong with me? I am going to serve YOUR mission with all I have. What else should I offer? I shouted and shouted and I cried.

A moment later, in strange a silence, I heard a voice speaking in my heart,  "John, you are the burnt offering!" It was the saying of the wind, some body’s breath, the Spirit. It meant so many things to me. What I hear Joining in God’s mission not with what I have, but with what I am, who I am, and my whole-self. This meant to me how we can be humble before God and people. This journey cannot be done alone. This journey is the journey we can do only with God’s help. In this journey, I am not alone. I am called and I am chosen. God is with me.

In this faith, in this trust, I can answer to God's call to ministry, "Here I am, a burnt offering. I will serve you with my whole-self by YOUR help. Thanks be to God. Amen."